He doesn’t miss a trick." (34:21)
“So why don’t you simply confess to God?
Say, ‘I sinned, but I’ll sin no more.
Teach me to see what I still don’t see.
Whatever evil I’ve done, I’ll do it no more." (34:31)
He knows my heart - there is not anything I can hide from Him. You can not trick God.
I am a sinner - who wishes to not sin anymore. I have sinned and will continue to throughout my life - that's what being human does for you. Through my sinning, I have damaged my heart in which only He can transform and repair. And although I am forgiven for my past and future sins, I am not taking the act of repenting lightly. It is my hearts desire to be a vessel for Him, to allow Him to shine through me.
One of the areas I have failed is my tongue and my fingers. In speaking/writing of things, although truthful, they were not words that glorified Him. I was trying to "trick" the situation into my favor, thinking that by speaking the ugly truth, I would gain power, sympathy, revenge.
"Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift." (Ephesians 4:29)
In other words, I failed the above greatly in regard to those who have disrespected me, rejected me, pushed my buttons, or hurt me. God has held me accountable to this sin and I am changing. Haven't quite figured out how you speak the truth about a situation if it's the "ugly truth". Do you not say anything and let God take care of it? That would be stepping out in faith as He wants us to do. To rely on Him to take care of us, not self. Not our own words, but His Words.
Borrowing words He spoke through my dear sister, Dana, in her blog regarding "Jonah":
"God has showed me great mercy and abundant grace just in finding Jonah to teach me that things are never what they seem according to our earthly expectations. His ways are greater then my own. He's telling me and He is telling you through Jonah that He is listening, that He cares for us, that He never misleads His children. If a message is from Him it will undoubtedly bear true."
"Teach me to see what I still don’t see.
Whatever evil I’ve done, I’ll do it no more." (34:31)
He has taught me my sin. The evil I have done. He has opened my eyes.
"But speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ." (Ephesians 4:15)
By not speaking in love, the words were breaking down, not building up. I fall before Him humbled. How I have hurt Him with my words in the state of my unloving heart. I have thanked Him for His forgiveness and asked it from whom I offended. And even though this person rejected it, because I did it for Him, for my relationship with Him, I am okay. He brings to mind words I read recently, "One of the most Christlike ways we can be is to forgive someone that doesn't forgive you or ask you to forgive them". It is without any trickery I am doing this. I desire to please Him, to become more like Him, to be His vessel.
Because of His great love.
"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way." (Psalm 139:23,24)
He allowed me to find my Jonah so I may continue on in "our" journey -
talking and walking in love.
less of me - more of Him............
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