There are times when I will stand up straight, hold my head high, and walk with determination. Determination to make the right choice in bringing glory to Him, to not fail Him. And I do fail Him. Usually before the first step is placed.
Thankfully, He is right there with me - blessing me with forgiveness even before I fail, giving me encouragement and direction to live on. And I do. In all those times I fall - He never, ever leaves me or turns me away. He always has my back, my front, my sides, my all. He always sticks to me like superglue.
There have been times when I read about the Holocaust, different Martyrs deaths over the centuries, and I wonder, "would I die like that for Him". I know without hesitation I would die for our children, and most likely Curt. But, would I die for the cause of Christ if I had to choose?
One of the stories from the Holocaust that has always stayed in my heart is that of a young mom. She had two small children, a boy and a girl. The Nazi's made her choose which child would be executed or they both would be killed. She ended up choosing the little girl to die. She felt the little boy would be stronger, was older and may just make it through the hell they were in. She took comfort in knowing that her daughter was with God. How do you live with that choice and not feel guilt? Or hate towards the Nazi's? To not let the evil consume you?
You stick to your guns - totally with God - my God. Not just halfway - totally. It's when He brings to mind my Christ and all He has done for me. How He "stuck with His guns" and choose me. That gives me determination, encouragement, to bring honor to Him.
Each and every day I have to die to self - I have to stand beside Him no matter what - and trust in Him.
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