Thursday, March 03, 2016

"Our Climb" - 03/03/16 - Numbers 18-20

"So take Aaron and his son Eleazar and lead them up Mount Hor. Remove Aaron's clothes from him and put them on his son Eleazar. Aaron will be gathered there; Aaron will die." (Aaron was 123 years old when he died on Mount Hor."(20:26)
During our visit with Nichalas and Amber last month, they took us to Zion National Park, Utah. 
There aren't enough words to describe, nor does the camera capture, the breathtaking beauty of our ABBA's Awesomeness. 
Driving into the bottom of the canyon and looking up or trying to capture in video what my eyes were taking in,  I was moved to tears.  Even now, just thinking about our time there in His "marvelous works", my heart moves my soul and my eyes tear up.
In reading today, I was reminded of the many moments while hiking the trails with Curt, Nichalas and Amber, I would think about the accounts in Scripture of the climbing of mountains by different persons. 
               This is a picture of Mt. Hor.

I think about Moses receiving these commands from his ABBA in regard to his brother and wonder how their climb was. That's quite a mountain to climb at any age. What did they talk about? Their life together, growing up- while apart - growing old - the journey God had taken them on? How was Eleazar feeling? Did he know, have any idea? Did Moses share with Aaron what God had said - or did Aaron already know? Did they bury him or leave his body to the elements? Did God bury him? I imagine this climb was as hard on Moses as Abraham's was with Isaac, knowing he would be coming back down the mountain without his brother. 

Even when we have faith and know without a doubt where one in Christ will go - death is hard......Bittersweet.
 In my selfishness I desire the person to remain here with me. I think often of those who have gone before me - and how I miss them.  Our two babies - wondering what they'd look like - be like. They would have been 29 and 26 this year.  I think often about how different our lives would have been with them here.  My three grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends - missing them even more so as years go by.

The other night as I was falling asleep, I was thinking about the fact I am on the downhill side of life. At times it scares me, how quickly time flies - the years. It motivates me to get my life organized - my home, etc. It gives me a sense of urgency to look/act on opportunities and Divine Appointments He puts before me.  I look and see all of the "Moses" He has put into my life and heart, making this climb with me.

I remember in 1989, while living in Kearney, MO, God suddenly weighed upon my heart for days to call my cousin, Cyndi. I hadn't spoken to her in years and although I didn't have her contact information, I had ways of obtaining it.  
While ignoring His urging and not making that call or writing a letter, I received a call. 
A call telling me Cyndi had suddenly died on her couch.  During her autopsy, it was discovered she had congestive heart failure. She was 30 years old.
Whenever I think about not following ABBA's urging then, I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Talk about wishing for a do-over. I think about her life, how lost she was, and wonder if God was trying to use me as a lifeline to Him. Or maybe just to touch base and give her some joy in reminiscing about our past times together. We were very close growing up, and unfortunately our lifestyles, choices, distance had drawn us apart. No fights or anything - just drifted apart.
But perhaps, He wanted to use me as a "Moses" in her climb up the mountain. 
I know I can not be a "Moses" to everyone, but I can be a light for Christ to everyone I meet. Even if only for a moment. He is so strong, so Awesome, and can do so much more in a moment than I can in a lifetime.

We discussed in Bible Study last night what tool in His tool box do we think we are.  I feel it depends on the season, the job, the need, is what determines the "tool" we are.  As I age, I pray I do not ignore His urging and am the whatever and however needed "tool" for Him.  I pray I will choose to be His tool to others, so they don't have to climb through this life alone. 
For everyone is dying, making their journey to their mountain top.
To remove their clothes and be gathered there.
Everyone will die. 


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