Monday, April 16, 2012

Not a loser - 1 Sam 22:1-2, Psalm 57 & 142, 1 Chronicles 12:8-18, 1 Sam 22:3-23, Psalm 52, 1 Sam 23:1-12

"So David got away and escaped to the Cave of Adullam. When his brothers and others associated with his family heard where he was, they came down and joined him. Not only that, but all who were down on their luck came around—losers and vagrants and misfits of all sorts. David became their leader. There were about four hundred in all."(1Sam 22:1,2)

This summer will be my 35th High School reunion. Wow, that looks even older when actually written out than when I say it! The fifth and twentieth are the only two that I have attended.

I was never part of the "in" crowd. Awhile back I wrote about being a misfit - enduring the joys of being made fun of, not included and even bullied. For some reason I still allowed myself to be pressured into attending the fifth reunion. The 20th I mainly went to bury some ghosts. I am thankful I did as God really opened my eyes, not only to myself and how He sees me, but also to those who used to intimidate me. I stress "used to".

The invitation I received a few weeks ago brought up memories that I had buried deep. Not deep enough obviously. In trying to fill a void, to fit in, I did many things that I am so ashamed of. Thankfully, God reminds me that I haven't been that person for over 30 years. It isn't that I am embarrassed to attend this year, I just don't want to.

What I find humorous is that then all I wanted was to be included. Now - I don't care. It's because He has filled the void. He has blessed my life with grace and mercy. He has given me so many treasures - Curt, Adam, Nichalas, and Amber to name a few. My life is very rich and very full. I love so many and am loved back. I love truly belonging to this wonderful family of "misfits"! There just aren't enough words to express how very much I love the "family" He has blessed me with. And every day He introduces me to more siblings. How great is our Daddy!

The funny thing is that I am still a misfit in this world. I look at the people that Christ surrounded Himself with and they were mostly the same as the band that David had. Losers and vagrants and misfits of all sorts. Many of those in High School that were in the "in" crowd never grew out of High School. I see that being a misfit was actually the best thing that could have happened to me.

I so love that God is able to take the "losers" and make them winners. I love that He is able to take my shame and remove it from me with His forgiveness, grace and mercy. I love how He has taken my sins and used them for His glory. Most of all though I love how He took the world's rejected and made them totally accepted. I love that He has exchanged the world's measuring stick for His own.

But most of all, I love that I am one of His "misfits".


Julia said...

Loved your message, and you're part of the "in crowd" now, and it's exclusive for eternity! :)
I've never been to any of my class reunions and have no desire to go. When I go home I see the people that I want to see and vice versa, simple as that. It's funny now looking back at the things we thought were so important don't even fit into our vocabulary anymore! Part of God's molding us into His vision.

deby said...

thank you! It makes me smile from my heart knowing that I belong to the same "in" crowd as you....