When I was young, I didn't really have any friends. God blessed me with one or two here and there, which today I can look back and see He was trying to save me. I was made fun of - today the word would be bullied. I was not included, ganged up on and threatened - physically, verbally abused. All the times in gym I cringed, when the captains had to pick teams. I was always picked last and they would argue about having to have me on their team.
I always felt terribly alone - and I wanted to die.
Something stopped me. Looking back I see now it was God. Then - it was just "something".
Not until Adam was born did I really "buckle down" and get to know God. I know one of the reasons I love this verse is, "I'll set up my residence in your neighborhood; I won't avoid or shun you; I'll stroll through your streets. I'll be your God; you'll be mine". He has taken up residence within me. He knows me through and through and still He loves me. He will never avoid or shun me. He desires to be with me. He is mine and I am His.
He has given me Curt - who after 29 years knows me better than anyone - and still he loves me. Wants to be with me. He has blessed me with two wonderful sons, who know and love me. A daughter-in-law, who also loves me. He has blessed me with many friends, who call me, who want to be with me.
I don't know why that I was bullied. I was very shy, no self-confidence. Probably an easy target. I do know today I am able to recognize the victims. To have empathy for them. I do know one of my gifts is encouragement. And that is what I try to do. To help these victims God puts in my life. I know I do not want anyone to go where I have been. It really was a type of hell.
He didn't rescue me from Egypt, but He did rescue me from this world. A world that lied to me, made me feel unloved, unwanted, undesirable. He has whispered into my heart truths - of how "fearfully and wonderfully made I am", of how I am "in the palm of His hand". How He gave His only Son - for me -
Because He loves me.
I know also, another reason I love being in His Word, carrying it in my heart, is because it is Truth. Truth that I can stand on and in. Truth that makes me want to live for Him.